DEAR ABBY: About a month ago, my longtime friend "Orville" told me he had bought $280 worth of women's clothes. He went on to describe how "great" it feels to wear them.

He says he has been a cross-dresser since boyhood, when he started wearing his sister's clothes. When she found out, she continued dressing him up and he loved it. Orville says he's a woman trapped in a man's body - something about brain lobes.

Orville has told a lot of his friends, and now he is isolated. I don't go over there either, because I don't want to hear it. (He even said I should try it.) We are in our 60s, and I think Orville is headed for trouble. I just can't believe he is gay. Does he need a shrink? Please advise.

DEAR SHOCKED: Feeling trapped in the body of someone of the opposite sex does not make a person "gay." It means he or she is a transsexual. Your friend needs understanding, not isolation. By all means he should see a psychiatrist - one who specializes in gender disorders.

DEAR ABBY: I have a problem. I have been having this recurring dream that I am getting married to my boyfriend of four years, and every time I have the dream, I end up backing out of the wedding. In other words, I always panic and run away. What does this dream mean?

DEAR DREAMER: I'm no expert in dreams, but to me, your dream means that on some level you're not fully committed to marrying your boyfriend. Pay attention to it because that's something that you should examine with both eyes open, in the clear light of day.

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